How many minutes does it take to individually unwrap and eat 20 Cadbury mini eggs while driving – and theoretically pacing yourself?
About 90.
Nom nom nom
Bloody Easter. I quit sugar and lost 16 kilograms but I absolutely cannot refuse those brightly coloured eggs. I’ll unwrap them with care, seeing how many perfect foil sheets I can retrieve. I’ll leave some in cup mould and put them on my fingers to talk. I’ll absolutely shred the rest into a million remnants in my hurry to enjoy the special sweetness that comes in small and shiny form but once a year.
I also blame the service station attendant who offered them to me at a discounted price. What a bitch.
Sadly, 20 eggs did not last me for the whole 3 hour drive to my parents house. Nor did the scenery distract me enough not to hope my parents had more eggs.
Look, a tree.
The driver reviver station didn’t have free mini eggs either. Not even really shitty cheap ones. I had to settle for tea. So not what I stopped for.
Look, another tree.
Finally, we arrived. To find my parents were in fact stocking these. Bastards.
Happy Easter. Drive safe.
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