As I sat in the darkness of the cinema yesterday I was having trouble breathing. No worries, I’ll pull out my trusty puffer and have at it.
Seconds later I was inhaling handbag scrud. Dirt, crumbs, bits of unknown stuff. An asthma puffer isn’t a sealed unit, and scrud easily finds its way in. In hindsight I should have checked it first. In hindsight I have night vision too.
Which brings me to my list of things that should not roam freely in a handbag, even if you have the cleanest bag in the world (and are therefore probably not a parent of young children). Get individual travel cases right now for:
- Asthma puffer. For the reasons above. mmm crunchy inhaler spray.
- Tampons. Partly because you don’t want them tumbling out while you rummage, and partly because scrud doesn’t go in lady parts.
- Hairbrush. Not only because you don’t want to put scrud in your coif, but because you don’t want hairy snacks. Unless you’re a bush lovin’ lesbian.
- Spare underwear. Yours or your children’s – I’m not judging – but when you’re looking for a tissue, don’t get confused.
- Tissues. I’m too cheap to buy the travel packs, I just shove several in loose. Which then get torn and manky.
- Makeup. Sometimes your lovely and expensive makeup will work its way open and decorate your other posessions.
- Sunglasses/reading glasses. Scratches aren’t cool.
- Dogs. Okay, you’re a freak, let’s get that out of the way. Next, because you don’t want it rubbing its junk on your lipgloss. Or do you?
Have I missed anything?
Sure, your bag now resembles that of an OCD person, but for good reason. Putting everything in its individual handbag pocket isn’t going to cut it, scrud travels. Trust me.